This is episode number 1067 with one of the most recognized Personalities in the world Priyanka Chopra Jonas. Welcome to the school of greatness. My name is Luis house a former pro athlete turned lifestyle entrepreneur and each week. We bring you an inspiring person or message to help you discover how to unlock your inner greatness. Thanks for spending some time with me today now let the class begin.
Rory T. Bennett said if you aren't grateful for what you already have what makes you think you would be happy with more and entrepreneur be Smith said I have stood on a mountain of nose for one. Yes. I am pumped about our guest today. Her name is Priyanka Chopra Jonas and Priyanka is a multi award-winning actor and producer and one of the most recognized Personalities in the world a former Miss World. She made her movie debut.
In 2002 and has appeared in more than 60 films produced in India and the United States. She has written her new Memoir on finished as a way to commemorate her career and life up to this point and it was my pleasure to speak with Priyanka today. And I know you're the love hearing about her wisdom about her new book and the new movie. She's in on Netflix as well called white tiger. And in this episode we discussed how Priyanka became one of the biggest actors both in the US and in India how to lean into your in.
Securities but also build up your confidence how Priyanka sets up her days for Success when she has so much going on how she is fighting to change the stigma against women in the world how Priyanka navigates having work-life balance and relationships what to do when you put your entire life into your work and it doesn't turn out the way you wanted to why we all need to work to be more vulnerable and so much more. I am so excited about this. I think this is going to help a lot of
of people so make sure to share this with a friend and let me know what you think about this episode Louis house.com / 1067 or just copy and paste the link wherever you're listening to this podcast and a quick reminder to subscribe to the school of greatness over on Apple podcast as each time. Someone subscribes. It helps us reach more people and Inspire more people in the world. Okay, and just a moment the one and only Priyanka Chopra Jonas
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Welcome everyone back to the school of greatness. I'm very excited about our guest. We have Priyanka Chopra Jonas in the house. Welcome to school gradings. Appreciate you
being here. Thank you so much for having me.
You have been taking the World by storm over the last 20 years. You've one of the most recognizable women in the world. One of the most recognizable actors personalities and you've done so much good with your brand-new with your following. I'm curious.
Is there ever a point where you feel? Excuse me? Not sure of yourself going into a big meeting a big opportunity a big a big role or moment in your
life. Definitely and I can give you an example that I kind of wrote about in my book because I remember it so clearly this was a 2014 right? So it's not like really far away. I had a talent deal with ABC Studios to do a show with them and it was my
Step into America to take a me a bit was a lot of lamenting that took me into you know saying all right, because it would take time out of my Indian Korea and that means I couldn't do as much work in you know, so is large risk like who is it? What if it doesn't pay off what if it's a waste of my time? So all of that was playing in my head. And anyway, I took the decision I had this amazing talent deal and I loved this one show called Quantico and I had to go in and audition for it.
Now I had had a prolific career in India for almost eight nine years by then. I never had to
audition audition was auditioning was Far Behind miles 2020. That was Miss India days.
Yeah, I was like yo, bro. Everyone does it here you're going to do it you're starting out and it's new. I knew that my practical mind knew that but I remember when I walked into the studio where the audition was.
and you know, there were a couple of chairs outside and there were two other girls and it was beautiful and they were everything of this character was
And I was like, why would you do that? Why would you let the other actors? So I was thinking about all of these things freaking out in my mind. I went to the restroom and I was like, alright. Thankfully it was empty. It was great. It was only two stalls I checked there was nobody else and I just had one of those moments that you have in romantic comedies, you know, you look at yourself in the mirror and you're like checking yourself. You're like yo you got this you have done 50 movies. Do you know how many movies that is 50 movies?
And I gave myself a whole pep talk and I was like, you know your job you're not new at this you have experience you have way more experience than those girls sitting outside use that use what you know, and I really like empowered myself. I strutted down that hallway into that room and got that job. Wow, it took talking myself into doing it.
What is this self-talk you do internally if you don't have a mirror it
You're not alone in a bathroom. What's your process that you say to yourself? What are the reminders? What are the mantras meditations that you think about before
that it always helps me to voice it whenever I'm insecure I either I'll write about it somewhere or I'll speak to somebody who I trust my mom my husband my best friend, but I find it easier to talk about it. So that's why I have
Healthy relationship with my insecurities because I take away their power by discussing them. I choose not to live with them alone in the dark recesses of my mind because then they become monsters and then they become really really large and they're usually not real so it's always been very helpful to me whenever I'm feeling crazy or insecure or afraid or even if I feel like I made a mistake
my dad told me this when I was very young when I was, you know, 16 the first time he sat me down and he gave me a glass of champagne and I was like what and he was like, yeah, you're 16, you know gonna have a glass of champagne with me. You're gonna do it. Anyway, it was like he told me he was like whatever happens in your life. You should feel free to be able to do it with your parents. There's nothing to hide from us. I'll always be in your corner and you know,
He told me that about feelings. I always had the freedom to talk to my mom or my dad as a kid about anything. I was feeling at least to my father. I wouldn't discuss the boyfriends. But my mom she was like my best friend. She knew about every you know, object of attraction that I ever had and I think that that sort of gives you the sense of confidence to be able to talk about it. And I just think it's a great first step.
Step to get rid of insecurities.
I'm just a big believer. I love everything you're saying and I'm just a big believer that if people really listen to this and understand taking in what you're sharing that it's hard to achieve anything without confidence. You could have the greatest experience. You can have the greatest degree the skills. You could have the family you could have the money like you could have good looks whatever it is. You can have this stuff. But if you don't know how to build confidence when it matters, it doesn't matter if the world
Leaves in you if we don't believe in ourselves, nothing's going to happen and the reversible
and believe in you exactly I believe in you and I think like as someone in the public profession, you know, my job is to be entertaining and be confident and in every step that I take in every move that I make but I think recognizing that confidence is not something we are born with it's a skill. It's like, you know, it's a muscle.
Almost if you think of it like going to the gym and you know to have muscles and in shape, you got to work at it just like the vocal cords people the greatest musicians in the world. They use, you know, their their vocal cords, they do riyaaz, like we call it in Hindi but which is warm ups and stuff like that. So confidence to me is like that you start using that at a very small level everyday life, you know when you're in school.
There were times when I was in school where I used to take the other whole hallway because I didn't want to bump into someone else when I started High School by the time I was in 11th grade. I was walking in the middle of the
hallway just around you get people moving away. Yeah. I was
like, excuse me. I didn't even have to say that. I was just walking because that's the same person but I think that in any profession or any aspect of life confidence is perception is reality. Most people believe that right. You know that
At how people perceive you is what they think reality is. So give them something perceivable. Mmm.
Amen of that. What would you say are three things on a daily basis that you do to build confidence that you think anyone could apply for their life, even if they feel like they have no confidence
when I wake up in the morning I take time in the bathroom. Like I shower I will, you know pick the outfit that I'm stealing today. I will you know sort of doing my makeup and my hair sort of
Me or my skincare routine actually night helps me be sort of introspective. Otherwise through the day. I'm very erratic. I have you know, multiple balls in the air professionally. I'm doing a lot of things I'm always behind on time always playing catch-up. So the end of the night I'm winning the day. I really give myself some silence I play music and you know, I put my creams on and I really think about what the day is going to be like and how am I?
My first step outside is going to be when I take that first step outside my safe space it sets the tone for my day. So I try not to have it be erratic or scary or like, you know, if I'm late and if I'm running that always sets the tone for my energy through the day, so I try to really, you know, start my day on the tone. I want to have and the confidence I want to have and at every given step during the day I remind myself of
Things I have instead of the things I don't have that insecurity comes from a lot of it. Sometimes I think comes from oh my gosh. I don't have this. It's not good enough or I'm not good enough or particular scenario or a particular situation or you know, we start judging ourselves. And this was another lesson actually an activity that my mom and I used to do is we used to count our blessings and you know me and my husband do it too whenever we're feeling crazy because our schedules are in
Insane we are you know always in different parts of the world. We do that we count our blessings about just five things that whenever you're feeling sort of crazy and unstable that you know, you have that you're really grateful for and I'm not even saying this superficially this was like, truly an exercise no matter how badly off you are someone else's Works often you
That makes it so easy to count your blessings.
I mean, especially watching this this latest movie that you're in I mean white tiger it I've been in I've only been to India wants I went there for years ago and studied meditation in Chennai for a couple of weeks, but I went to Delhi and you know con traveled around a little bit. I didn't see everything but I saw a lot of dark things and a lot of things that were constantly reminding me. Wow. I have a lot to be grateful for every moment. So I think it's important to have that perspective.
Active in our lives that we always have something to be grateful for even when it's the darkest time. There's something to be grateful for
absolutely and that's so empowering that to me is my greatest Mantra is, you know, truly intangibly do it on your fingers do it like just five things and it's a great exercise to do with someone as well your kids your family, you know anytime. It's just like five things then you have to just say rattle it out five things that you can think of at that point.
Ain't but you know, the crazy part about the white tiger is that it's based in India and you probably reacted to it because it's shot so authentically but if you think about it, the majority of the world lives in those conditions, you know, and the socio-economic divide that exists right now is only increasing like even the sustainable development goals have been set to eradicate extreme.
Ready? Because it's such a big problem. There's such a large population of the world and we as privileged Society. We as privileged people anyone who has a roof above their head and meals on their table is privileged and as privileged people like that's something that's our concern, you know, there's a large generation of children who don't have a choice in their future or in their lives. They don't know if they can have aspirations.
Our dreams and how desensitized be well past time, you know, you've driven past a homeless shelter and you've not even looked at it or a homeless person and not even looked at them. It's the desensitization that we as people who have and that's the differentiation between the Have Nots but it's also a reality and it's a reality every see everywhere in the world.
I don't want to give away the whole movie. I want everyone to watch it because it's really powerful and inspiring to see someone.
Come from you know poverty to essentially become, you know, an entrepreneur and be successful in their own way and the story is really powerful. But you took on a role that is I found fascinating because that's probably not. I don't know if that's what how you would react in real life because I know you have such a giving grateful heart caring about Humanity, but your character does something that's very controversial and you essentially from my opinion. Don't take accountability.
Yeah, and and how how did you feel doing a role that is probably against your morals your values and the way you live your life right
now. I never judge my characters, you know, like I never judge people Live and Let Live each person is individual to their decisions. And if I started you just would never be able to play bad guys, and I love playing bad guys, but I
What was most interesting for me when I was playing Pinkie is she's an American. You know, she and I am an Indian who's grown up in India and understands the complexity of the diversity of that country. There is no one India there is multiple India's and you can spend your whole life trying to get to know it and you still never know her. So this is one aspect of India that is showcased in this movie, but it's also it's more than that. It's
It's the story of this one man and everyone else from his perspective. So it's not us looking at him or the country. It's him looking at Oliver saying oh, you know and especially with my character. She's woke but she's fake. Whoa, right? She's one of those girls was like, why don't you pull yourselves out of your circumstances? I my parents worked in a bodega, you know, and I pulled myself out. Why don't you do it. He doesn't have a roof over his shoulder his
His family doesn't have food. It's a completely different complexity that most woke people don't have the ability to understand including me. I lived there and I can't claim to understand it because you know, I have had basic Lively life rights since I was a child. I've been to school. I've had an opinion about where my future is going to be choices and that's when so amazing to me about this movie with a tie.
I leaned into playing a character that was fake woke and you know pivoted when it wasn't convenient me and my husband both in the movie. Not my real husband. Right, right. Oh my God the character in my in the movie. Both of us sort of like were like, this is not the right thing. But you know when it wasn't when it was inconvenient, we kind of stood back and watched and that's a very human testament which is why there's this movie which was originally a book by aravind. Adiga.
Which came out in 2008 it was a man Booker Prize winner. It was a New York Times bestseller when this book came out, that's exactly what it did. It was such a human sort of transcript human behavior, you know flawed not black or white living in Gray all of them living in group, which is truly how we live and it's sort of self-reflective. It's in it. It should make people feel introspective and think about
The last time we behave like that plus it's clever and it's sarcastic. I sarcasm is my favorite language. So I really enjoyed the tone of the movie as
well speaking about sarcasm. Was it pretty easy for you to step into that character living in La then with all the woke fake won't people here.
I mean, I will say that I I may have been inspired by my surroundings just a little
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I'm curious. Excuse me. I'm curious about your Evolution as a woman in this industry. Typically younger women are more desirable for opportunities in their late teens early 20s, and it's like when you're 2627, it's almost like you're old as a woman and you may not be the young sexy one anymore something in this industry. How do you feel after getting in your late 30s now how have you evolved personally to not allow?
That stigma to hold you back from being who you want to be from accepting yourself from loving yourself from innovating and Reinventing yourself that you've done so many times. How do you not let that stigma hold you back?
I can't say that. I don't I just am hoping that it doesn't happen to me. You know, we live in a world where anything is possible right now as we've seen in the last few years a few months years as well. And I think that I remember when I was in my
when I was 28, my mom sat me down one day and she said, you know, you girls have a shelf life and you're reaching that where you know, the older boys they're always looking for the younger girl to act with and even if they're in their 50s, you know, there's still going to be working with 20 year olds, but you're going to be old and you need to think about a business of acting opportunities. Stop coming your way. That's
I actually started my production house. Wow. I was like, you're right. What if I'm like, I need to be financially independent of my life. But at the same time while this was happening to me, I recognized that Innovation and Reinventing who I am even from me is so important and being true to the craft that I'm doing and the the service that I have to provide which is my job. So I started trying new things. I started wanting.
Grow, I didn't want to stagnate into doing the same kind of roles. I didn't want to stagnate in, you know, similar kind of parts or even languages and borders and I did music I was signed as a wreck recording artist to Interscope permit bows. I pivoted from that into television that I'd never done English language TV. Then I moved into features in America. Now, I'm producing in India and America and acting in both these countries which are two of the greatest movie industry.
In the world, but if I sat down to think about the glass ceiling that was built for me, I would never have a trajectory powerful enough to break it. Wow, because I didn't make that glass ceiling so I don't want to think about where it is, you know, it's been made by other people. So you just kind of have to have you know, speed and run towards your endgame and you know have a goal and be ambitious and fuel that ambition every single day. What is the end game?
To have a legacy. I think I want my children to be proud of you know, the the Legacy that I've had. I want to be hopefully, you know part of you know, the history books of entertainment where I may have contributed to the Arts in some way with the work that I have done or the work that I create or work that I will do. So I want to be able to as a woman, you know.
Leave a better world for the girls after us like the women before me did for me. I don't think about voting today. I don't think about driving today. I don't think about aspiring to have the same job as a man and all of those fights were fought by women that came before me. So it's my responsibility and our responsibility as a generation to leave it better for the next one. So those are broad Strokes of my end games
and what I mean.
I'm sure you get this question a lot. I'm just curious because my audience is a lot of high Achievers the their big dreamers. They're going after what they want their learning the skills the tools to become more confident more more giving all those things. It sounds like you're doing everything all at the same time. How do you navigate intimacy connection love with you know, your husband your family your friends the people that matter the most to you. How do you navigate relationships with such a busy full
plate? It's not easy, you know.
Not as much Face Time as you would possibly want but I when I made the deal with the devil about, you know running at this fast-paced many years ago. I realized that they would be sacrifices that are required and you know when you have there's no free lunch in the world and when you have Ambitions, you've got to sort of pay for it and
But I overcompensate or I could try and compensate with making sure even if I don't have face time or if I've liked for a very long time in my life. I missed, you know birthdays and Diwali and New Year's and I would always be working and all I could do was apologize my family always understood because you know, I was I was working at something, but I think that I I made sure that I always call I never forget her.
As I would always call Anna birthday if I go to a city even if I can't meet someone my family my friends. I'll make sure we FaceTime will cause I'm very it made me very thoughtful about the people. I love I love loving the people like that I care about I love making them feel special and I love being empathetic and I think it's very important to leave the baggage of the job behind.
When you walk into your house and just be true to what you're feeling. I think it's it's important to choose relationships when you're really busy because we can all be caught up in life. And you know life is like really fast River, you know, you don't know what the currents are going to be because it's just moving. You don't know what you're going to bump into because it's just moving but you have to choose to hold onto something when you want to take a breath right just like that if you choose to hold on to a relationship.
Whatever that might be with your children with your family with your parents. You have to make the time and you have to tell the people you love that. You love them. Don't just assume that they know
you got some wisdom Priyanka. I love this. Thank you. I'm curious about I know how meaningful the relationship was with your father and he obviously got to experience a lot of your success and I'm sure he was extremely proud of you for you know, the three thousand movies and all the projects you worked on.
On but I'm curious. What do you think personally, he would be most proud of that you've done in your life since his passing
but I didn't give up. You know that I didn't rest on my Laurels. He used to always push me. He would always push me to never be satisfied with what I have. He pushed my ambition. He flamed my ambition. He was always like what's the next thing? What are we doing? He loved hearing stories about the next move.
That I was doing I see literally marry them to him in the hospital bed as well. This is my character and Ice to break down my characters with him or movies that I wanted to make and you know, they were phases in my life like that a little bit of a dark face, especially after my dad died where I felt like, I don't know if I could keep up with the life that I had built and what was expected of me by then because I personally took a hit and
and I personally was feeling
Sad and you know sadness sort of.
Sadness is strangely seductive. You know, it kind of sucks you in and you're it's like it feels comfortable. It feels like you're floating and it's easy like might be harsh a little bit. But the joy that you feel when you choose light when you choose to let go of the seduction that sadness I think my dad was afraid that because I'm very sensitive that I would have been.
My sadness for a long time, he was very afraid of that even before he died used to always talk to me about don't be sad. Do not be sad. That's not going away. I'm always with you. No, but I was I was tremendously sad and but it takes it takes choosing yourself and I've done that multiple times in my life. And I think it's such a powerful tool because the longest relationship you have is with yourself.
I read somewhere that
out you sharing that you come into this place alone. You leave this place alone. You've got to you know build that relationship with yourself. I love you keep saying Choose Yourself A friend of mine wrote a book called Choose Yourself name's James all teacher and it's a really powerful book. It's about you know going after you want and choosing yourself and not allowing someone else to dictate what you can and can't do and all that stuff. But I love that you keep using that phrase because I think it's important for people to remember to be reminded that we need to choose ourselves when no one else will do.
Us we need to be there for ourselves when we're
sad ones job. It's no one's job to choose someone else. You know, your parents will do it for a while. Your spouse's will do it for a while. Maybe your children will do it for a while, but you are no one else's responsibility but your own yeah and what you do with your life and the choices you make dictate the some of your life. It's such a it's such simple math. Actually. We are the sum of all art
Choices and you know, if you want to achieve something that you want to achieve greatness and I'll give you a small example the white tiger the movie I was never attached to it. I was never approached for it. I read about it on Twitter that it was being made. I read in a trade magazine. I read a you know deadline actually that the white tiger is being adapted by the director Ramin bahrani and a for Netflix and I was like I
To be a part of this movie. I called the agents. I called my aging's I made them call the producers. I chased remain from Mumbai to New York to LA. I met him three times I auditioned with him three times. I offered my services as an executive producer because I wanted the material because I want to align myself with good content and I believe that would be good content and that's such an example of what's the worst that could have happened there.
I'd have said no and that's happened to me multiple times. It's not stopped me from trying again. That's choosing yourself.
So 3 times you went after him. Did he say? Yes, he did say yes, the first two
times know really but you're being well, he asked me if he asked me would I would I is it okay if you read with me and I was like, of course, it's my job. I'm an actor. I mean, you know, whatever you think I am, but at the end of it I'm that's literally my job. So I read with him twice before he is.
Incheon said yes,
how does he does? Say yes. I mean you're you know, the biggest name that question that's like a true or when someone says no to you they're like a true artist like it needs to really fit and feel the way my vision is as opposed to just going after you know the power that you have I'm assuming it was just can you imagine how much
that made me want it even more I
died. He was like, yeah, you're running around the world. I need
I need it now. I'm
curious what would
You say looking back, you know nearly 20 years ago to when you're just getting started in this space this industry. What would you say to young pre about what she's about to experience. Is there any advice or wisdom you would offer I
would say don't sweat it. I stressed out so much. I was tied up so tight in my early 20s, and you know, I wanted to please everyone and I wanted everyone.
I love my work and love me and you know, that's what I thought being an actor was is to be loved. That's not what it was. I got so caught up in the glitz and glamour of it when I was so young and I was just starting out in the business, but it took me a couple of years to realize that actually it's not about any of that that's a by-product of the job. You know that people know you or know of your name or love you hate you or have
an opinion of you but the job really is the art and the craft of it. It's the one thing as we've seen when we've gone into this pandemic that people have done is consume content content has been a friend. It has been a companion and that's my job. That's what I'm creating and I take immense pride in in being able to provide that service in a way to two people as a producer as an actor just as a Creator as an
And when I realized that it became such a fun job for me. I started finding characters. I started infusing life in them. What's written on paper is you know, the writers visual but what happens between action and cut is where I come in and it was so much fun to be able to take what's on paper and converted into people and I just love the magic of my
job and it sounds like the more you
focus on the magic of the role in the creativity of it and less on pleasing people and doing something to make people like you you're going to attract and be a magnet to all the best
opportunities to all the best opportunities to support to affection Love for sure, but you know because you're the reasons for doing the job need to be right and my reason for doing my job is nothing outside of the joy
I see you, you know when someone watches my work and feel something and is moved or is affected and that gives me the greatest joy and that's the you know, those are the footsteps. I want to leave behind as an artist. It's not going to be about you know, how many followers I had or my bank balance or you know where I live. It's going to be about
People remembering my work and you know being moved by the work that I have done. And yes, I take myself seriously and I yes I take my job seriously and I'm proud of
that. What are you connect yourself Worth to what are you tired too?
Um,
I think I'm here you say it's not about it's not about the number of followers the bank account. What are you?
Yeah, it's very actually clear to me. I tired to if I am doing tangible work safer.
Example I go to set and I'm acting in a movie the white tiger or I'm writing my book which my Memoir where I put pen to paper or fingers to keep add whatever. I have done 10 GB or a business that I am, you know invested in when that works when that succeeds. That's my self-worth because I've created it with my hands with my mind with my ability.
Not with the way I look not with you know how how much of dinner conversation I was for somebody else or what I treated but because of something I created and something that I hand had my hands in when that's successful. That's my self-worth. Yeah.
What happens again? You've done you no more movies than anyone. I know what happens when you put your life into your work, you know, maybe it's two months three months how
Long creating a project you have big expectations. And for whatever reason it's not received the way you want by an audience or it doesn't do as well in the box office or whatever. How do you navigate those emotions after the effort the energy the love that you poured into something that maybe doesn't get the results you're looking for.
I've had so many of those
I
can give you a list of how to deal with that
because I think a lot of people get defeated they'll do.
Do one thing and then it doesn't work the way they expected and then it's like why Try
Again, absolutely and that's a very human feeling but when you want to create a legacy, it's what you do after failure that matters. Everyone's going to fail. You're definitely going to fail if you're trying a new thing, you know, and if you don't try a new thing you're not going to evolve so if someone has put all their eggs in one basket and is like, you know, this is everything I know and it's going to work.
You're setting yourself up for failure. And for God to laugh. You got to take a risk and you've got to know that there's always going to be a risk that it doesn't work out and it's going to suck and you know, you lock yourself up in a room and eat pizza for five days and get over it, you know and pull your big girl pants up and go back to work and create something else. I think it's very entitled to expect that the first time or every single time. It's always going
Going to work out. It'll never always work out the person you are you're worth comes from how you react after you fail or how you react after you're hurt that's being a person of
Integrity. Hmm, and you're just speaking some truth today because I love this
getting it out of me.
What do you think about in terms of creating and cultivating happiness for yourself? I think a lot of
All find happiness in a lot of the wrong things whether how many likes they get or what someone says to them or what their partner does for them to bring them Joy or whatever whatever expectation how do you cultivate happiness for yourself to the point where it's not reliant on other outside factors, but it's
within I think it goes back to what we were speaking about a little bit earlier that you're born alone. And you're going to die alone. This is your journey and yours only.
So now a for this journey we're expecting, you know, someone else to contribute to your trajectory. It's skewed that's never that's not the truth. If that's like some utopian illusion that people live in no one can contribute to your happiness. It's only you that can contribute to receiving what you're receiving. So if we receive from somebody else that when they give
And gift validates me or when somebody writes great comments. It makes me feel better about myself you're receiving validation instead of having it within yourself and creating your own validation, which comes from like I told you my self-worth comes from seeing the successes out of things that I have worked towards creating that I you know, I have my hands and feet into my movie my job my book my business the things that
I have done and if I was you know, a carpenter would be my bedpost or if I was a tailor it would be my address but I think taking pride in who we are and what we bring to the table is I think the greatest joy of them all and it cannot be compared to what somebody else does whether that's the best partner in the world, you know, the most number of followers or you know sycophants that will always say you're
Saying that's not the truth when you sleep at night. Do you have a fitful sleep or are you content? Do you wake up anxious? Are you stressed because you need someone else to do something for you. I think that's the journey we all have to make is to come to a place of what can I do for myself today? That's going to make me smile
Amen to this. I'm loving this. What about when people say nasty things about you there, you know all the negative.
Comments the way you look the way you act the projects that flop and it's just hate online newspapers. How do you respond to that? And how do you how do you not let it affect you
personally. I have an only on social media. Please. Don't get me wrong. Not anywhere else really some people love to hate me and it almost seems like it's their favorite thing to do is, you know, just hate on me and spew Venom and it just shows how small.
They are and how much free time they have honestly and that their self-worth comes from berating me when I don't even know you and you don't even exist in my world. So yes, I get pissed off sometimes especially when it's like personal things, you know attacks on my family my Integrity my country my ethnicity my you know gender when it's like personal things my job. You can have an opinion
If I movies the you can say it if my movies great you can say that's totally fine. But you don't know me no one really knows me except my family and my friends and the people I choose to have around me. It may seem like, you know me, but you really don't so when people make commentary on my integrity and me as a person as if they know the intentions behind my actions, that's tough.
But the only way to sort of deflect from it in my mind because just like everyone else I could go down that rabbit hole and live there be like, you know combat with people but it's not worth it because when I look at you know, my social media, I see so much love and affection as well. I see so many people who are like, yeah your movie, you know, this movie that I just had released on Christmas called we can be heroes isn't number 1 most watched a movie on Netflix ever and
I was like, sorry. What is the statistic that people have watched it multiple multiple multiple times and there's so much love that came at me for this movie. Even though it's a great movie. And is Robert Rodriguez and these amazing kids. So how do I focus on these trolls when there's so much joy being thrown at my at me and maybe I have the luxury of having that kind of support if I didn't have that kind of support and if I didn't have people who Maybe
we were saying, you know good things or wanting to be kind then maybe I would have gone down the rabbit hole of feeling really bad about myself too. But at least for me I choose to focus on my
support. There's a famous speech by Matthew McConaughey when he won the Oscars where he said he's chasing his tenure future self whose his role model someone like that. I had anything ever catch up with him and he can never catch him. He's always 10 years ahead.
I got there and he's always a next step. I got to talk to him a couple months ago about his book and I asked him a question. I said, okay, if your 10-year self now looking back at who you are at this age. What would your 10 yourself be proud of that you're doing and what would your tenure to self give advice to for you right now? And I'm curious same question for you. If you're 10 years out from now if you can imagine all the things you've created and accomplished and the way of being you've shown.
Into the world the impact you
make ten years before Ten Years
After and years later your 10 years future self.
Okay,
you know think of all the accomplishments all the movies all the impact you make on the world everything you've created with your marriage and your relationship whether your family whatever maybe what would that 10 year ahead Priyanka say to you now that she is proud of and what would she say for advice on how to navigate?
Gate the next 10
years. I feel like I'm at Miss World again. I think the one thing I hope my tenure ahead self would be proud of is the past that I was stepping on, you know the of wanting to create stories of my own not just for me, but, you know people like me when I started working in Hollywood
He would they weren't really the kind of parts that I wanted to do that were written for being coming to me. And again, I'm not someone who's entitled to expect parts to come for me, but they were just not being written. I wasn't seeing them when I was watching content either and it was a little bit of a struggle to you know, say that I want to play a mainstream part. I don't always want to be a stereotype that an Indian girl should be in Hollywood show or movie and that was a struggle and it really inspired me to sort of start.
creating content and I was seeing so many other people do it around me Mindy Kaling, you know Reese Witherspoon so many women and I hope that my older self would say that that was that's the step in the right direction for you because it takes a lot of confidence and it takes a lot of sort of credibility in yourself to have to have garnered credibility and it took me 20 years to do it to be able
To Garner enough credibility in yourself in my work to now be able to create content not just for me, but for other people who I think deserve a platform and representation South Asians are one fifth of the world's population. And when you look at Global entertainment, you don't see one fifth of the world's movies being South Asian, right? So I feel like I want to be in a step in that direction and tell cross-pollination of stories. I'm an amalgamation of
Of the greatest movie Industries in the world, right? And there's something really powerful about that today. We're consuming all our content on like streamers, you know, and the pandemic is shown us that we're not going to theaters were watching everything on our TVs and there is an audience for everything and I want to be able to you know, create diverse content female content. So I hope that it and if I'm just about stepping in that direction, so I hope my ten year older self would be like
Good girl, I'm really glad you did that and the advice I think would be to take more time out. You know,
I'm always
I know I know I'm always like going from one job to the next I'm always like I planned. I know my next two jobs, you know, I have to have my next two jobs ready while I'm doing one. So there's just never any time and
Since I married, you know people people are constantly like, you know, we were all babies and I'm like nobody's asking guys about nobody's asking any of the guys that question but it's going to require me taking some time off to be able to do. Yeah, so my older self is definitely giving telling me, you know smell the roses just take a second and enjoy your new house and you know your dogs and your family
with all the opportunities and Ambitions that you have. Do you feel like that?
I will be your greatest challenge for the next 10 years, which is to say, okay. I'm going to take two weeks off here a month here, you know six months all I mean do you think that will be your greatest challenge? I
think to say no would be my greatest challenge. I'm just really greedy.
How do you say how do you learn to say? No with every opportunity coming your way except for white tiger that you had to, you know, beggining and
scratch. Oh, I mean even when opportunities don't come my way. I'm a beggar. I'll go after them if I like something. I'm a dog with a bone like, you know, I
Created my own opportunities and there have been opportunities that have come to me America wasn't easy. It was not easy to navigate. This is 10 years of me pounding the pavement doing music here. You know, this is 10 years later that I'm at this place where you are saying to me that I have opportunity coming my way, but it took me that long of being in America to get here and so it wasn't easy, but you know, I think that I'm just plant them.
I finally made it here.
What do you think about in terms of the Law of Attraction and abundance mindset? Are you a believer that you know what we think about we can truly start to manifest when we start to take those actions. Is that something you practice in terms of think of abundance?
I've never practiced it. I've read it. I've read the secret. I've read all the books but
I'm just trying to catch up with my day,
you know
from when I was a kid. I I don't have the bandwidth to think so far. So I have this mathematical formula that I think that I my life goes by right like so for example in school when you have we used to have this thing called annual exams which at the end of the year you have this one exam which is final examinations and that like sort of determines if you're going to the next
Or not but there are smaller little like midterms and small little tests that also contribute to your grave. Right? So if I make sure that I get an A in all the little little little little little tests by the end of it. My report card is always going to be excellent. So why spend so much time thinking about Excellence that I may or may not achieve with, you know fate and destiny, who knows where life is going to go?
I believe life is short and I believe if you aim for excellence every day in every job that you have your life is bound to be full of Excellence
dropping gems all day. I'm loving this. I've got a I've got a few
amusing known to the Law of Attraction. Oh my God. Now, what is what is that going to attract?
I think you're I mean, I think the law of attraction is really living in a gratitude mindset in a grateful and a grateful Place thinking about the vision of yourself that you want to become an
Thing on it which sounds like you're doing that by saying, how can I be great today? How can I continue to evolve and interact? So what is the question you wish more people would ask you that they don't
ask and I don't want people to ask me more questions than they already do.
What is the thing that you wish they would talked about or one more curious about in
terms of I do wish people would be a lot more curious about my ambitions and dreams.
Rather than you know my personal life or or My, you know, future children or trivial stuff like that, but I'm also part of pop culture and I recognize that consumption of pop culture is pop and so it's okay. Like I said, I made the deal with the devil a
long time ago,
but I would I wish and I get very excited when I have conversations like this honestly Louis because
I get to talk about you know, my feelings and my beliefs and how I have my journey of how I've become the person that I am today the woman that I am today and it's it's not been easy. I'm but I built walls as soon as I became a public person about you know, it's no one's business to know if it was easy or not. I'm not someone who rests on my Laurels and I'm definitely not someone you know, who washes my dirty Linen in public or or like, you know,
Shows off my weaknesses. I just I've had to learn to be strong and in the face of adversity at every given moment one because I'm a woman second. I'm a woman of color. I'm always trying to achieve more than my circumstances. I've always been that wherever I wasn't whether I was in school or my profession. I always want to be more than what the hand that has been dealt to me and I think those traits require you to be sort of
Normally, you
know, yeah the white tiger right, you know comes around once in a generation. You're very Global citizen your travel around the world you've lived in multiple countries, you've experienced a lot of different people in your life and you've seen a lot especially being in this industry in the entertainment industry. What do you believe from everything you've seen in the last four to five years that's happening in the world on all the different types of topics. We don't need to talk specifically about politics or anything. But what do you believe that I just feel like it's been very
and hard for everyone in different ways for men and women in all people. What do you think? We should expect more from men moving into the you know this year and Beyond kind of this new generation. What should we expect men to give more to be more and what do you think we should expect women to be more of to create more healing in the world together to create more connection together. What do you think we can both do
one thing? I feel like parents in general.
All can teach their sons to be vulnerable and can teach their sons to respect women. I think that is a responsibility of the world in a big way is you know, when we're talking about sexism or we're talking about gender equality or feminism. Even for that matter. The largest thing that is required is for men to be in our corner and for men to respect their
Sisters Wives daughters friends because you have been given the torch for eons and it's in is important for you to share it. It's important for you to recognize that you need to create that opportunity for women. I mean, honestly, Congratulations, by the way on your first female VP I come from a country that has seen, you know, several females and governance and that's an opportunity that needs to be created. You know, I also think that as
what men can truly do is that is create opportunity for females and you know, give Credence to their intelligence give Credence to our abilities and you know recognize it for being up here and being an equal in as as different as we are, you know in our physiology is in our ideologies in our behavior and all the other complex things, but when it comes to men
Garrett and when it comes to Opportunities, we should be creating more for women men should be yeah and for women if we're talking about creating healing to find it in our heart because women have really large parts. We will forgive us, right we forgive but to find it in our in our hearts to forgive patriarchy that came before us and to fight towards creating a world.
Is inclusive of both genders, which is respectful of both genders with gives opportunity for both genders women have for eons been treated like second-class citizens and they're bound to be angry.
But you know, the only way to create healing is to forgive existing and previous misogyny and patriarchy and fighting for your rights so that we leave at easier sort of world and male-female dynamic for our children. They shouldn't have to inherit this this problem this inequality. They should
agree with what you're saying there and I'm curious what's been the hardest thing you've had to
Forgive
do I forgive though after I gave an advice
ha ha ha
that's why I'm imploring women. It's hard for us to forgive pretend like we do not forgive. I can forgive anything after I've given myself enough time to get over it. But usually it's really hard for me to forgive. I don't forget definitely don't forget.
But after there's been enough time that's passed, you know time is the greatest healer, then it doesn't matter and then I'm easy to forgive but when you know when the pan is hot, I don't know if I'm a forgiver very much. It's been what's
been the thing that's been the hardest for you to let go of our forgive whether it be when you were younger or now or any time in
between. I think it's harder for me to like more recently like forgive forgive say
Remarks that dismiss the work that I've done or you know the life that I've built and that are sort of devaluing everything that I've worked towards because you know, it's been Brick by Brick for me and it's all been my own so I think to push my buttons those those things are I haven't been able to forgive yet. I remember my
mom. I'll make sure I never push those buttons on you.
You who is the most influential person in your life growing up? And what was the greatest lesson that you still hold on to today from that
person? I would say I was very influenced by both my parents and I'm very close to both of them. I think the deepest influence that I've had from both and if I can take a second to tell you about that, my father was you know a sense of adventure. She said be like
You know water sort of adjusts into wherever it has to go. It can be a mighty water pump could be a teardrop because be like that and why he said that to me was because he was in the military my parents were in the military and you know, I may have been for years old. When I remember the first time he came he said we have to move and we moved every two years and I hated it begin. So I think to give me a sense of adventure. My dad like said to me
Me that you know, every time you go to a new place you can have a blank slate. No one's going to know where you're coming from. So whoever you want to be you can be that was very exciting to me. So that was influential on my dad's and my mom she always told me that you make sure you're always financially independent. It doesn't matter whose daughter you are whose wife you it doesn't matter.
Where you go? You have to stand on your own feet. And you know that was really pivotal advice at a very young age that she instilled in which gave me a really large sense of self.
Yeah. I love the photo of you the throwback photo of little free. I think you're 4 or 5 years old and I like your Dad's military or outfit or something and he's talking about having this sense of adventure and one.
Under in everything you go this curiosity. I think you said in that photo which I think is pretty cool. And that's interesting. When you move to the USA. Did you feel like you could shed off old identities or did you create a new identity when you came to the USA? Because when I was a kid as a teenager, yeah, because your mom with kind of sharing that with you or was that like or did you stay who you were when you moved?
Well as a teenager, first of all, you know, when it's not like going to a new school. I was changing countries
at 12 jurors everything. Yeah,
everything like I've never traveled abroad before I called him a call but that's a neighboring country, you know, so this was a whole new experience and the America that I was familiar with was, you know from Saved by the Bell or other shows that my mom wants like holding the Beautiful.
Remington Steele, and I was like, hi. Everyone has lost hair and was wearing glamorous pose and everyone's white and then I landed to America that's not true. America's diverse America's bustling. I was shocked with the space America had and my 13 year old mind that 12 year old mind at that time. I didn't know who I was because I was so busy trying to figure out who I wanted to be in this new world.
Old but by the time I left the us as a sixteen-year-old, I'd had a few, you know tough situations with America. She and I kind of that may have gotten into a real and I left said I don't want to be in this country. I went back to India. It's it's me and you know took back the character that I created within myself. I was confident I was
You know aware of myself as a teenager as a girl suddenly aware of vanity and the clothes I wear when I left. I was a twelve-year-old tomboy, right? I've grown in not just my mind but in my measurements as well. So for my bag when I came back it was a huge shock is no I went as a kid and I came back as a woman in a way and
it's also that I think that's why I feel like I'm an amalgamation of India and America because my most formative years were spent in both. And by the time I came into my profession which was at 17. I've been influenced by both countries in a big way. So I'm I think a mix of both the best
way what was the biggest challenge you faced during those, you know, 12 to 16 years in America. What did you love about America? And what did you not
like
High school was the biggest college high school's hard man.
Yeah, that's
not easy. It's hard for everyone especially like a girl just come from a different country and I was like ninth grade and we Cedar Rapids Iowa and I didn't see anyone that looked like me. I don't know how to, you know, get from one class to the other even because in schools in India teachers come from two different classes the students because there
if there's like 60 students of class, can you imagine all these kids trying to get two different classes that would never fly so teachers go to different schools from something as basic as that navigating the cafeteria Indian be carried our lunch not like little things like that was high school was a whole new planet for me and then the social culture of trying to make friends and you know kids who had known each other for middle school and a
Up together you're trying to like navigate bad also at the same time it just about becoming a teenager. So I was aware of boys at that whole thing. It was just so much drama, you know, I was doing teenage things and just like that that itself was very hard. I didn't have time to think about the big stuff. I was just navigate. I
did you have big dreams when you're in India before then or in the USA.
A about who you want to become or did that come
later? I kind of decided to be a different person every year whoever I was fascinated with right I could never stick to one thing by the end of it. I kind of narrowed it down to engineering I was you know, and I loved I love science. I still love science. I love deck. I wanted to you know, study Physics and planes and Aeronautics and I was really good at math and physics. So I was like
You know, maybe that's where medical patients especially coming from an academic family. My family, my parents are both Physicians and I just always knew I was never going to be a doctor. I mean I faint at the sight of blood so I was not going to happen. So this was my chosen profession, but I never had the chance to sort of take it out. But before that like as a kid every year I would like oh, I want to be a dancer or oh I want to be a pilot.
Pilot or it was never an actor. I never even really thought I could expert I didn't even think it was a choice. I don't know why that's just never something anyone in my family thought could be a
choice. So it was never even a fantasy a dream a choice.
You weren't never
was. When did you realize that this was something you enjoyed and who was the person that you neither encouraged you or said, you know, this is a possibility you could go do this and be really
successful after I was thrown into it.
when I was 17 my mother and my brother said get my pictures for the Miss India pageant because when I came back to the to India after you know, me and America broke up, it was hard in high school in India because unfortunately American high schools and the standard education is not very competitive globally and when I went back to
India kids were studying integration and you know all of these crazy crazy Mass, but I haven't even like seeing those supposed to see it in senior year. So I was really behind I was feeling really stressed out. So I'm my my mom gave me my brother's room when I went back and he was he was 10 years old and he was kicked out of his room. So he made this master plan of trying to get me out of the house and I have taken these, you know those small shot. So you like it with your
Cheesy,
yes. Yeah. So I've gotten some of those pictures taken and my
brother you hit those poses. Well when you went right back into the seventeen-year-old pretty you know,
yeah I did but my brother implored my mom.
She had these photos. Maybe we should just send these pictures in. I don't know my mom maybe to appease him. Maybe just as a lot sent those pictures in and really I got selected for that. I went just to get my exams, but I was like great. I had a great reason to not give these exams and I want and then when I won Miss, India,
I suddenly realized that I was thrown into the deep end people taking pictures of people asking me about me and on politics and you know my opinion on interpret Intercultural relationships. And as I wait what I'm like 17 years old no idea to learn so quick because you know, it was sort of thrust upon me that not saying that you know when it came to think or
I swim I was always going to swim. I'm just that cat. You know, I can't help it. So I just had to like figure it out really quickly and I was sent to this world magically the same thing. I've never been a pageant girl go on in my family and every model forget it makes having those aspirations and you know suddenly I was trotting in heels and I was doing it. Well,
do you think that you would have won Miss India and Miss World if
You didn't have an experience in the USA and didn't have influences from the USA. Do you think you would have happened?
I think it would have asked for a couple of reasons that I was always a very confident girl and that was inculcated to me to my parents parent. You know, they raised me have an opinion in a room. They raised me to raise my opinion even if people disagree with it. So when your parents don't tell you that you're making
The wrong decisions or berate you. I mean whose parents will be okay with their 12 year old moving countries just on a lark so when my parents were like that they never thought that my dreams were praised. And so I always had confidence and I feel like my experience in a pageant and even in the entertainment business in our business confidence is your greatest Weapon It's if you have confidence in your backpack, you're going to have a large jet free.
Confidence really isn't something you're born with it will teach her self-confidence. I teach myself confident every day really did you know eventually you find to make friends with it? And you're like, alright, you know confidence. I need you today confidence that have a day off, you know, you kind of figure it out when it
when is the moment in the last 20 years that you've been the most insecure or lacked confidence the
most the most I've had many of those in my career.
Whatever when you have a trajectory that you're looking for in a career that I always want my projected to be going up just like everybody else, right? We all want to win but that doesn't just happen by thinking about it. One thing. You've got to take the steps to get somewhere and I feel like when you're taking those steps, especially in our jobs, which is so transitory. I'd like to be of my movies don't work or
You know, I won't have a job at it's not like 925 where you do a check is coming in the consistency of that doesn't exist in my profession and it's kind of like you got to just go with the time about it evolved. You gotta keep moving. No, it's a constant hustle. And so there's a large heart button security because it's an insecure business. How long are you going to survive in this business? What are you going to put it to? How are you going to evolve? What is the evolution of this?
self in the even as a human being the next couple of years and I think that I just have learned how to
Be insecure when I'm feeling allow allowing myself to being
really so when you're when you're feeling uncertain or insecure, you you allow a
different I indulge because I know you know.
I like my life and I like my mind and I like the person that I am and sometimes each person can be vulnerable and emotional and it's okay to allow yourself to feel that when we're hungry we eat right when you're thirsty you drink water. Sometimes you need to give your body in your mind what it's asking for. So if it's hurting and this is not something I always knew right away. This is on the other side of 35 is when I but it's okay.
Just take a second appearance of your you know, the best way of dealing with that at least for me is talk to someone you love and just admit the fact that you'll be able to secure and somehow, you know, it takes away its power when you voice it and when you discuss it as soon as you think about everything you have buses, the insecurities were feeling.
It's just it's not
powerfully more. Mmm. How long will you allow yourself to experience it to indulge to drink it up the insecurity until you say, okay, we're not get enough is enough. I got to I got to build my confidence back in me right
now. I mean, I've had phases of it being a couple of hours could be a couple of years.
Yeah, it just depends on how quickly you can do it. But I know that each and every time there has been a point where I got bored.
Okay, I've
done it. How much do I wallow in self-pity? Come on. Now? I'm bored. I don't even know where else to Pivot in my self pity and then you just kind of you know, like a Leah says that's just self off and try again, but that's the only way I guess but I do.
Definitely feel this marriage allowing yourself, but also checking is it is the ok I'm being indulgent or do I need there's a difference between the two you can be indulgent for a really long time and I was for a couple of years ago when I got bored, I was like, all right, I forgot how to get out of it. So I was like, okay, we need to teach ourselves how to not be insecure and invest and choose myself. How am I going to do that? I'm going to feel good about this.
I'm going to do things that I want to do. I become very solitary sort of meet people. I just moved to America again for for a for a TV show that I was recalled. I know new country on a show which is like every every day. This is 11 months. So five six days a week 15 18 hour days was
Easy no time for anything and I kind of became very solitary and I start people in your life who I was and I was doing the same job of moving from a country where I had a very solid career of starting all over. You know, I've had 50 movies that I've done but here I was saying hi guys. My name is Priyanka and I'm
an actor. Are you there? Like who are you? Yeah,
exactly and that was okay.
To explore outside of the boundaries that I had worked in and if I wanted to try something new I'd have to start from the beginning and you know, I spoke with myself I talk to myself Arab eyes themselves. They said let's work backwards whenever you have a goal say for example, you want to buy a car.
What do you have to do you to figure out? All right. This is the price of the car. These are my savings. This is how much liquid cash I have. How can I spend it? Can I buy? What is my mortgage the figure out everything and if you just work backwards and say alright, I have this much money that need this much when you work towards making them. So the same way of life if you want to reach a goal, which is great and say for example in your case in the way I tackle that is just working back.
You don't backwards about if I want to be at this place. I need to what should be the step before that much. We've said before that it sort of breaks it down for you to a very micro level.
You've got it this movie. I want people to watch I watch the last night fascinating movie you do an amazing job. They can go watch it on Netflix now once this is out the white tiger make sure you guys check this out. It's really inspiring watch it with your friends virtually, you know.
With your friends all that good stuff and you've got a book coming out which I'm really excited to check out more of I haven't been able to dive into it fully but I want to really dive in more now after hearing about your heart on this deeper level because I think I haven't been able to hear a lot of this stuff from you the stuff you're sharing today. So I'm really inspired by your generosity your heart your critical thinking your creativity all this stuff and I'm excited to go through the book. But why did you want to write a book now at this stage of your life and really talk about these
things?
I was approaching 20 years of being in Show Biz, you know, and I wanted to commemorate that some way and I thought that you know, maybe writing about it initially started with I was going to call it letters to my younger self, but it was too long a title. So I was just at scrap that but that's the tone of the book it's sort of me. I've been running so fast at such a fast pace, you know for the last I think 30 years of my life since I
I can remember I've just never sat down to take a breath and the pandemic like it forced forced all of us to take that breath. I was going to write the book anyway, and it was going to be like essays or thoughts. But when I rap when I was at home for these six months during quarantine, I really dived in deep and I realized that I don't remember much in my life. So I was like, oh my gosh what has happened to all my memories and I started writing the Milestones that I remembered because that's how I remembered.
My life I was like, oh this school. All right. I moved this country. Like I didn't remember little things and then I started filling in the blanks and when I started doing that it just flowed out of me. It was almost cathartic. It was almost like regressive memories that I didn't think about advice that I would give myself, you know things I'm appalled by that I did or things I you know may have never addressed because I just had to keep moving and I've done all of that in this
This book I'm terrified of, you know exposing an extremely vulnerable side of me, which I've always liked sort of been a little, you know have a wall out but I don't know the defense has just fell when I was writing this one and I'm just really scared.
What are you most afraid of? What are you most afraid of is it people seeing certain aspects of you that they haven't seen or what speaking
abilities and my struggles. I've never really spoken about specific struggles like, you know in instances and
Sims and telling real stories like of things that have happened to me which I've never ever spoken about. I really call this the in between interviews book because I give so many interviews my whole life, but I've never really talked about what happened in between them. I've kind of been very protective of my privacy and now like I said with time, you know, I reached a place where I'm self-assured on the other side of 35.
Of comfortable with the career. I have built and career. I want to build and the life that I have that it took me it gave me a second to take a breath and introspect and this is a reflection of my introspection. Zai have dissected my failures. I have dissected my emotions and those are terrifying
things. Yeah, and you're sharing with the whole world. Look at Wyman's I'm
Hired by you for putting this out there and I want to have one to make sure they go pick up a few copies and give them to their friends. It's going to be a massive massive hit. I'm very excited because the more we reveal and become vulnerable to more the deeper. We become connected other people from my personal experience of of not being vulnerable growing up told I wasn't allowed to be vulnerable as a right. I'm a Young Man growing up in Ohio and the Midwest and you probably experienced a lot of that in Iowa seeing just you know boys have this
Kind of mask on
its and generally boys that are told that you know, you're crying like a girl or don't cry because you're not tough enough or some that's what I was talking about. We have to let everyone needs to feel and allow themselves to feel including boys.
Yeah. It's it's interesting. I mean, I got a couple of final questions to wrap up with you but just sits around this topic. I when I was 30, I opened up about being sexually abused when I was a five-year-old boy.
How it shaped my identity and put up walls and made me very angry and resentful just and triggered a lot of defensive. Right and I ended up doing a lot of work over the last eight years, you know researching healing studying about this and meeting with the experts about how men can heal their Trauma from the past that they have never talked about and just like what you said in the beginning this interview, you know talking about your insecurities even allows you to take the power away from
you it gives you your power back and I when I opened up about being sexually abused the most terrifying thing ever, but it also Set Me Free and I took the power back and it was a it was a process of many years to kind of feel that confidence and really let go and heal but it's it's amazing when when we can heal as human beings men and women, but I feel like men have a lot of work to to let go of certain things that they're holding onto and when we become vulnerable then
Truly connect in my opinion. So I'm so appreciative you for sharing all this wisdom on on these insights because I think it's you're speaking my language. So I appreciate that of
course and that's so inspiring and brave that you did that that's
amazing. I appreciate it. So
sorry, you had to go through
that. You know, we all have to go through we all go through different life challenges. This was this was my path my journey and I look at it as a massive blessing and I'm very grateful for it today because it allowed me to dive deeper and
typing men heel and just having compassion and empathy for when I see it men who are angry or defensive or reactive because that's the way I was my whole life and and I didn't know how to change. I just thought this is who I am. Don't try to change me, but you know, I'm still not perfect. I got a long way to go but it's a constant process and journey and I
mean, no one is really I mean if we're striving for Perfection, it's like playing golf. You're never going
to be good at it. I saw you swing it on your wrist.
I really get a little shot the other day. I was a couple months ago. Shut your
pretty good. Apparently I have an aptitude for it. So I'm excited to be able to take it out. But it's like, you know, it's futile to achieve, you know to try and be a perfect golfer. No one can yeah, I realize that really quickly.
You look good though. You're good form. Thanks. This question. I asked everyone at the end of my interviews that's called the three truths. So I'd like you to imagine a hypothetical scenario.
Oh that it's your last day on Earth. It's many many years away if your last day and you've accomplished every goal every dream family everything you want. It's happened. You've impacted the world. You've got the foundation's all this stuff. You can think of it's not it but for whatever reason all of your content has to go with you to the next place wherever that is. It's got to go with you. So your books your movies this interview anything you've ever done has to go with you. So no one has access to your content anymore.
Except you got a piece of paper and a pen and you get to write down three lessons that you would share with the world. This is all we would have to remember you by what would you say? Are those three lessons or what? I like to call your three truths,
okay.
I think the first one would be.
Like I said to invest in yourself. Mmm to choose yourself. That's my truth.
Whatever. I left this Earth being was because of my relationship with me and the fact that every given step I chose what was best for me and by that I don't mean like by being selfish, but by choosing for my validation and my self
Myself words to come from my actions and my achievements that would be one truth. The second one is the only way to love is completely hmm, whether that is you know, the love you have for your husband your child your parents your friends the world Earth the environment but there is no being careful in love and there's don't be careful in love just give it and you know flow like
A stream or waterfall. It's so joyous. My third truth would be family. You know the family you're born into the family you choose and the family that chooses you.
You know, there's so many people in your life that come into your journey and leave, you know for a long duration for a short duration. But the memories of respecting and honoring family is is very important. Those would be my three foods. Mmm.
Love those I've got one final question for you. Okay for before I ask that
right questions for pageants, by the way, I
think he's going to have an alternate. I'll be the host. Yeah, but for - why has that question? I want to again remind people that the white tiger is out on Netflix and it is amazing a great movie love it. It's captivating and
Ring story of overcoming a lot of different challenges. So make sure to watch that. You also have your book out which is going to be a massive hit called unfinished and I want people to go and get this right now by it. Did you get it on did you read it? Also, is it on audio? It's an audiobook to so if you want to listen even more terrifying but oh my God, that's so hard to do. I've done that twice for my books. It's so just like four and a half days of repeating myself over and over. I'm stuttering
10th day right now.
Now, oh no,
this is the first time I'm doing it and I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm actually having this is an opinion I have on a really crucial part of my life and I will say it right it's so
terrifying it such algae. Yeah, but anyways, priyanka's reading it so you can go download that and listen to it. So make sure you get it on Audible or wherever it is on audio get the get the hard cover as well and support that over on Amazon or anywhere that it's being sold. You're all over social media Priyanka Chopra everywhere Twitter Instagram.
Facebook and we're how else can we support you? How else can we serve your mission what you're up to follow you?
I think just just the work that I'm doing. I have some really interesting work that's coming out. Now, you know with the white tiger. I've just finished two movies during the pandemic actually, which will be releasing soon and just you know, follow my work be
Curious about the artist that I am I would love if that's that's the, you know, kind of support that I get for, you know the work that I'm going to create really.
Yeah. I love it. Well, I'll be following all these I'll be supporting for a long time. Hopefully when you're back in La we can connect some time and when I know that I know that all the people that I know who know you well are very supportive and proud and have been standing by for a long time.
I know that you're just a quality human being based on what people say about you. I know your father would be extremely proud to see everything that you've created in the woman you're becoming. I know I'd be amazed to watch everything that you're up to and I want to acknowledge you Priyanka for the gift. You bring to the world. You constantly show up. You constantly Inspire women you constantly inspire all human beings about what's possible for going through the different challenges. You've gone through and constantly choosing yourself and Paving the way.
You're an inspiration to so many so I acknowledge you for costly showing up and doing your best again, not perfect, but you're doing your best and it's and it's inspiring to watch my father wants to do is of course, of course this was leading up to the final question, which is what is your definition of greatness. It's so
funny. I don't really have a definition but I think Bruce Springsteen said this I don't need one of your rich. I don't want to be famous. I don't even want to be happy. I just
Be great and I think that when I read that it's sort of explain to me what I felt because it's intangible, you know, greatness greatness can be in the smallest things of you know, when you wake up in the morning and you're aware awareness of being kind to people being empathetic saying good morning even telling your parents you love when you haven't done it that's greatness. That's a great kid.
It's a you know, being a great spouse being a great daughter being a great, you know, there's greatness in everyday moments. And then there's also greatness in achieving her dreams. So I think being able to go to bed at night knowing that you have spent a good day on this Earth is the most important form of greatness and that cat that you can achieve by setting your own goals. My goals are okay my movies reason I have written my book. I've done oppressed day, too.
And a book tour and a and I sleep at night knowing that I've achieved my entire day. It could be that or I could be in sweats watching, you know Netflix all day and be smiling with my family and playing Scrabble. That would also be greatness to me but going, you know, living your life. I truly believe that there's got to be a reason right that we are born on earth and the most simple and logical thing to me is your
Probably our purpose of life is to live it well and to live it happily. So if you go to sleep at night being happy with what you've achieved in the day, I think that's the greatest of them
all. Hmm Brock. I appreciate you. Hopefully sometime the next few years when you're back in LA and people are able to see each other in person. I can give you a hug and say hello and thank you for your time today. I'm sure appreciate everything and I'm a I'm excited for all the great things to to lie ahead for you. So thank you so
much. I'm so excited to have been here.
This was such a great conversation. Thank you Lewis for being so insightful.
I have the dream of being a pageant question writer now because it's an
ultimate profession. I promise you
thank you so much for listening to this conversation. If you enjoyed it and you want to dive into another similar School of greatness episode check out the links in the podcast description. I've done more than 950 episodes of the past seven years, and I want to bring you more information.
Inspiration just like this.
Hey guys. I want to give you the chance to win a $25 Amazon gift card. We're going to be choosing for Lucky winners each week. That's right. Every week. My team and I are going to give away a hundred bucks to you. But here's why I need your help to get to know you my listeners better. So I've created a short and simple survey. All you have to do is fill out a quick questionnaire at Lewis house.com survey and that's it. It'll only take a couple of minutes, but it'll go a long way towards me.
Figuring out how to help and serve you the best in this podcast experience at the highest level. That's my goal for you and as a thank you for completing it. I'm choosing for new winners every week to get a 25 dollar amazon gift card. So go right now to Louis house.com survey to fill it out right now. Thank you so much for listening to this episode. I loved having this conversation with Priyanka. I hope we can get her back on in the future and dive in deeper if you wanted to come on from more wisdom.
Make sure to share this over on your Instagram stories tag me tag Priyanka Chopra as well and let her know what you enjoy the most about this over there or on any other place on social media. So make sure to copy and paste the link wherever you're listening to this right now and text a few friends are posting on social media and ask them what they got out of this episode after they listen to it as well. Or you can just go right to the link Louis house.com 1067 and share that with a friend right now. And of course this your first time here, please subscribe to the
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Raishin and messages from me right to your phone. So text the word podcast 2614 350 3960 and I want to leave you with this quote from Mother Teresa who said spread love everywhere you go. Let no one ever come to you without leaving happier. And I want to remind you today no matter what you're going through what you're feeling how much pain you're dealing with or uncertainty you have in your life right now. I want to remind you that you are loved you are worthy and you matter.
I'm so grateful for you for showing up today for Learning and for constantly trying to work on improving your life to make an impact on the lives of people around you and as always, you know, what time it is. It's time to go out there and do something great.
